Patience

It seems like all I have been going is waiting. I feel like I’m this limbo stage, where I don’t know my place. My future seems to be growing dim with each day. However, I don’t whether or not that dimness is just from my future being so unclear, or from my self doubt. It could be a combination of both, because my self doubt breeds thoughts of an unhappy future. For someone who has waited for years for his life to start, I’m just so over this game. Everyday it seems I have to play the same games just to get through the passing hours. And for someone who is determined to win each game, it seems never ending. At what point do I succumb to the rising pressure on my shoulders. I preach about mental strength, but I am strong enough to push through the final game. It starts by being confident in myself that nothing will stop me. That although I will be challenged and fail those challenges, that in reality it is impossible to fail in life. Because with each challenge I shall learn something new about myself, that will help me become a better me. I guess one can fail at life, if they never realize their failure. But it’s hard to stay confident when you fail, because it only proves my doubts. It only proves that I am in fact not good enough, and I won’t accomplish the goals I set for myself. Maybe I set these goals too high. Or maybe I can accomplish my goals and turn my dreams into reality if I just learn to be patient. I think now I understand. My current challenge isn’t about proving myself to others, but it’s about learning how I need a little bit of hope and a lot of patience to finally succeed. Goodnight and Stay sexy

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